The weather was nice today so I put on a pair of shorts and went out to get some food. It has been long since I last had the courage to wear shorts going out on my own and I was unreasonably happy about that. On the way, a man about my father’s age caught a glimpse of me (my legs) and started staring; and then he looked up my face, probably thinking I wouldn’t have the guts to look back. But I did, and I gave him the angriest look I could, and he gave in and looked away. And once again I was unreasonably happy because I thought at least I did something about it rather than just ignored it like some other girls would have. Then I got to the place and was about to get in to buy some calzones for me and my mom, when all of a sudden a [supposedly mentally retarded - as the restaurant owner said] boy ran to me, touched my thigh and ran away. It happened in a nano second but was enough to give my a shock. The restaurant owner yelled at him, of course; but everyone saw it and stared at me - and I was just confused; frightened, too, to be honest; and I didn’t know what to do but to walk out. As I was going home, thoughts - so many thoughts ran through my head: why did they all look at me like that? was I supposed to walk away like that or should I have said something? if I had, would any of those people agree with me or would they just think I was making a big deal out of nothing - or worse, it was my fault in the first place for dressing like that? and finally, why do I have to feel scared in the end? I remembered a girl once told me and our friends about something similar which happened to her; and they all just laughed and said stuff like: don’t wear such skimpy clothes next time then; you should consider it a compliment that you’re so attractive you get touched by that guy; it isn’t a big deal, really… I suppose they’re gonna say the exact same things to me if I tell them what happened to me just now. And that’s when I realize all the people around me are idiots. Some men are just straight up sexist; some other [smarter] ones pretend to support feminism but never really take women seriously. As for women; some would say they don’t need feminism because they’re ok with the way they’re being treated by men; some would be all about feminism while never really understanding the true essence of it. But who am I to say anything about it? I myself am still trying to figure out what true feminism really is. But at least I’m not oblivious of the sexist undertone which lies in every single act that happens to me, whether caused by men or women. I am aware, but what am I to do about it?
WHO SHOULD I TURN TO IN TIMES OF TROUBLE???
"What about your daughter? Isn’t she in her final year in college? Has she graduated yet? Oh she has? And has she got a job already? Oh so she hasn’t?"
Was supposed to write an email turning down a job offer but forgot to so the girl from the HR dept of that company (who’s been talking to me for the past few days) called me and asked if I was still interested in taking the job and I said no and explained that I forgot to write her back about it but I’m sure now she just thinks that I didn’t care to reply to her at all and I feel bad bc she’s really nice and we’d been talking quite a lot while I was interviewing for that job and ahhh
I thought What’s eating Gilbet Grape was overrated but it was actually very good.
What is so appealing about a sandwich with avocado and cheese and spinach and more cheese i mean the ingredients separately are all good but together they just don’t seem very tasty?
Whenever I open my mouth to say something I can always feel myself starting to get really annoying but only when I’ve finished talking do I realize I should have shut up.
Trying to get back into reading Junji Itou but am too scared.
I don’t even have time to cook these days auuu T_T